Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

Do you suck dicks with no reciprocation?

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I have a reading level above third grade

What would it take for you to consider yourself a "Swiftie" like Flavor Flav?

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

If everyone in Russia dropped into holes in the ground only never to return, would that be good for NATO and international peacekeepers? Can we convince Russians to be less diabolical, so they coexist? Does Putin stink like doo doo in the commode?

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I have complete contempt for fakery

I can count

How can I help my cat adjust to sleeping in its own room after allowing it to sleep with us as a kitten?

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

What do you think of the Quora group "It's Ok to Be White" for people who are proud of being white?

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

What would you change in the "Game of Thrones" storyline if you were one of the writers of the TV series?

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

Do straight guys like to see cocks?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

Why am I tired all the time?

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I don’t buy bullshit

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

Would you let your son wear leggings to school?

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

What would happen if Kakashi and Naruto switched places?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

Are landlords allowed to make unreasonable requests?

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

What is the reason for writing X^2 as XX instead of X*X?

I don’t cotton to rapists

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

Why do men like to have sex with a woman's ass?

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I understand how hurricane paths work

I can read

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I see through liars

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I actually pay taxes

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I have complete contempt for traitorism